renegadeRICEcracker

memorabilia

part of all the unfun stuff i need to do is unpacking the loads of stuff i had at my mom's, sorting everything, rearranging stuff in my new place, and finding new homes for everything while throwing out as much as i can. this all sucks, but i've been trying to force myself to do some because i need to figure out a way to make economical use of my space.

anyway. i just went through a box of old correspondence from college. i threw out some of it -- i figure there's no use in keeping birthday cards from people i barely remember, and i was never able to actually commit to collecting things like concert/movie stubs so i may as well toss the few i do have. but overall this very slow process leaves me (as one would expect) feeling really nostalgic. it is nice to read letters from good friends, but i also get a little sad reading letters from people who were once friends but later not. like when you meet someone and click but then later end up not liking each other (or one of you doesn't like the other or something). seeing things that remind me of the before part of the friendship make me sad -- it's like this simpler time has passed and you just can't get it back. i guess not so different from finding memorabilia from a relationship that went bad.

anyway. not really a huge deal. just brings up old stuff to think about. though thinking about that stuff also makes me really happy to be older. i feel like you just shed insecurity and neuroses layer by layer as you get older -- i was talking with a friend a little bit ago about how we are just so much more confident and at peace with ourselves now. (though i guess it hasn't been just straight improvement over life, there are situations where you can go downhill for a stretch -- but you get what i mean.) it makes life a lot easier -- thinking about high school and college also reminds me of so many things that i am happy not to worry about anymore.

enough babble. i am basically just avoiding more unpacking. back to it. happy new year!